In the Desert You can't Remember Your Name

Living in the desert for months changes a person. My peers might remember the song, “Horse with no name,” by Dewey Bunnell?

“I’ve been through the desert

On a horse with no name

It felt good to be out of the rain

In the desert you can’t remember your name

‘Cause there ain’t no one for to give you no pain”

Identity falls away when there is no one trying to label you. I could describe ourselves as nomads but I no longer feel the need for modern day attachment to labels by job, economic class, or any other myriad of sub distinctions that culture attempts to place on me.

I have become (for today) she who lives in the desert with the “plants and birds and rocks and things.” (Always wondered what the things were meant to be.)

It’s refreshing to just be, not to be judged or confined by expectations. I am free to be different every day. Today I am a rock hunter, searching for fire agates on the ancient slopes of old volcanos. Yesterday I was water hunter, filling water jugs and taking a weekly shower. Tomorrow I may talk to friends and research our next location. 

As I simplify life to what is necessary (shower is top of the list!), I return again and again to identity and ego. Who am I if I am not my career? If I am not a political affiliation? If I am just living in the desert with a trailer of no name? 

When I see our country work so hard to define a group of people, an ideology, or belief, we can see how this creates division. 

I am made different than you. 

Those with power are attempting to put us at odds. To make us right and wrong, good and bad, us and them. 

Listen closely to the language. Is there guilt or shame? Is there judgement or condemnation? Is there emotional manipulation to have a certain opinion?

Do we really want to engage with one another from this perspective?

I’ve learned that as I drop my ego attachments to being what is expected of me (career, class, where I live, sexual orientation, political affiliation) that I am whatever I choose to be at any moment. I am not constrained by division. I don’t have to box myself into a category of opinion, or belief. I can choose every day to be something different, or I can choose to be undefined. 

I hope we learn to approach one another with appreciation and compassion first and foremost, allowing each other the space to be whoever we choose at the moment. I believe in the basic human goodness of people (not those in power), if we were to label anything, maybe it could be, “Are you kind?” 

“How much do you hold love and peace?”

Then every other label is put into proper perspective. Because first we stand in our hearts toward one another, connecting in our common humanity. But this would require lack of judgement and lack of defensiveness. 

We get to choose how we want this journey to unfold. We have the power to decide what is important and how to relate to one another. What world are we going to create?

 A new year, a new vision, a new beginning. 

It all began around the March equinox. I experienced a spiritual awakening that continues to deepen as we roll into 2021. This was akin to peeling off layers of an onion, only many layers were removed all at once! Layers of denial, suffering, fear, perception fell away and radically changed my way of being in the world. 

It was like being stripped of all my comforts and standing bare in order to see myself and the world in its most naked truth. This challenged my ego and my most core beliefs. It took a few months to find some stability again in my new way of being. However, this stripping down to the essentials allowed me to access more of myself. Joy, peace, sovereignty, even bliss are now accessible in ways I never dreamed possible. It's been a magical process of uncovering, going within, embodiment and surrender.

It was as if a door opened to my spirit that I didn’t know existed. 

There have been so many wonderful new adventures and friendships. My sense of self and my place in the universe has shifted more this year, than any previous decade! 

Turns out I wasn’t the only one who experienced a spiritual leveling up during this time. Hundreds of thousands of souls across the globe had a similar spiritual shift. This global event is called The Great Awakening, and I don’t think it’s coincidence that it is happening at the the dawning of the Age of Aquarius. 

Since the most recent solstice millions more humans have experienced heart-opening, eye-opening clarity and enjoyed greater connection to Source/God/Nature along with insight into the upheavals happening around the world.

It hasn’t all been roses since the virus and political events created a U-turn in my life in spring and summer, but these challenging events actually acted as catalyst. Shay and I ended up on the road with our trailer and I turned away from the media, the stories of fear and turned deep within. Nature became a healing balm and kept me grounded during the external chaos. Traveling and exploring shifted my focus to the present moment and kept me from worry looping. Not having TV and barely internet at times kept me away from the constant barrage of media hype. 

As a result I was able to truly enjoy wherever we happened to be camping. The cactus, mountains, and jack rabbits are much more enjoyable to focus on then CNN! Due to my work I had to keep abreast of events but I was able to do this from a more detached perspective. Plus the balance of work/fun ratio heavily skewed toward enjoyment.

I have learned that I have the power to decide how I will react to external events. And how I react then dictates how I feel, and therefore my experience.

I can choose my reactions. I will have ample opportunity to practice this in the coming days and weeks as the unveiling begins and more and more humans experience awakening.

The events of the next months will be catalysts for everyone to look deeper within, to trust our own intuition and develop discernment and compassion. This is a time to develop unity and trust. This is a spiritual revolution that we have all chosen to be a participant in. As I watch the news today I remind myself that I can choose to participate in any narrative, or choose a reaction that aligns with my vision for the world. Again and again I choose to live in joy.

I am so grateful for our simple life. For the sun which powers our bodies and also provides electric power for our little trailer. For the blue skies, and birds, and the quietness of desert solitude. Thank you Universe, for this magical experience of love and beauty and joy. 

I will embrace it all!

Love to you all.